My time in Italy has drawn to an incomprehensible end. I feel alleviated. despaired. joyful. accomplished. With interpersonal dynamics as intricate and complexly humbling as the weaving mountains and mammoth cathedrals this whirlwind of compounded experiences has been a great voyage of mind, body and soul. I have never felt so little. I have never struggled more. I have never been shown just how selfish, lazy, weak or childish I can be. I have never had such an opportunity to see so much of myself or the beautiful world we inhabit. Now sitting in another country I actually miss the strife. I miss that growth that falls hand in hand with the constant reminder.. that insistent mirror of your most bruised parts and the contrasting glory of the unparalleled majesty that is Italy. Nothing has been more insightful. The loneliness. The tears. The crushing of an ego. The humbling realization that no matter how many people love you on the other side of the world, THIS IS WHO YOU ARE NOW. This is how you are being seen. This is how you are wrong. This is how you handle struggle. This is how weak you are. This is how you mess up everyday. This is how stupid you are. This is how you never understand. This is how incapable you are. This is your life now. Is this who you are? NO. NO. NO.
This is how you don’t get swallowed by the ego that surges up when every element surrounding you tells you that you are wrong. This is facing your weaknesses and being selfless.. and how LISTENING and LEARNING and not harping can make you feel like a conqueror… thank you Italy for breaking me down and allowing me the time to find my strength.
I am forever changed.. gratefully and humbly yours..